Was it Enough? | A Virtual Pilgrimage of Incarnation Reflections - Week 2

Imagine Jesus telling his Father, that wasn't enough, I need to do more for those I love. Dr. Terry invites us to make Christmas, the celebration of the Incarnation, about more than a symbol.

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Transcript

It seems to me that we have done a disservice to Advent and Christmas and the Incarnation by… I don’t know… making it nice and cute and predictable — a children’s pageant. And who doesn’t love the Christmas Eve pageant? You know: the angel with the broken wing, Joseph a full foot shorter than Mary, his rope belt inevitably falling off, the little kid playing the star whose arms lock in place until he finally announces, “That’s all for me.”

It’s adorable. It’s wonderful. But I wonder if the Incarnation and Christmas are not really cute. This story captures a little of that for me.

The time of the story: my wife and I were finally planning a very, very delayed honeymoon — like a ten-year delay. We had arranged for our kids to stay with friends, everyone packed, everything ready. Then we get that phone call — the one you hope is a prank because it comes at 3:11 a.m. It is not a prank call.

We are told my father-in-law has had a heart attack. And we get the proverbial, “If you want to see your dad and grandpa, you should probably come as soon as possible.” So instead of going to Mexico — apparently one of the coolest places ever with our AmEx deal — we go to Philadelphia.

Before we board the plane, my brother-in-law says, “Before you get here, you should decide whether you want your kids to see Dad in the condition he’s in. That will determine where we go after the airport.”

We talk. We decide: yes, we want our kids to see their grandpa and have a chance to say goodbye. They are ten and seven. We describe as best we can what they’ll see at the hospital, and that they’ll have about five minutes with him.

We go in — and you can imagine what that was like. Our kids are tender. They love this man. He was a beautiful guy. He used to have my son sit on his recliner every night before bed, tell him a little joke, then tap his chest and say, “You have a good heart. You have a really good heart.” Then my son would climb down and go to bed.

At the hospital I tell my kids, “You have about a minute left to say goodbye to Grandpa. So whatever you need to say, say it now.” They are awkward, tender, beautiful. My son Ian rubs my father-in-law’s forearm. Then I tell them: that’s it. You have to go. You can’t come back. You’ll be with your cousins.

They leave. Nurses come in and begin talking us through the process of removing the breathing equipment. And then — about a minute later — my son comes back in. I’m startled: I told him he couldn’t come back. He says, “No, no, Dad — I have to tell you something.”

He pulls me down to his level and whispers, “Dad… that wasn’t enough.”
 “What do you mean it wasn’t enough?”
 “If that’s the last time I’m going to see Grandpa… that wasn’t enough.”
 “What would be enough, Ian?”
 “I just need to get in bed with him — like I used to get in the recliner chair with him.”

So I ask the staff if we can have a moment. I lower the bed rail. I lift my son — awkwardly — onto the bed with his grandfather. Ian whispers a couple of things to him. Then he simply holds him. And then he takes his hand, taps his grandfather’s chest, and says:

“You have a good heart, Grandpa.
 You have a really good heart.”

Then he turns to me: “That was better, Dad. That was enough.” And he climbs off the bed and goes back out.

I don’t want to suggest I understand the Incarnation — but it has something to do with our bodies. These bodies. And when I saw my son in bed with his grandpa, it was like the Pietà. It was one of the most beautiful Christmas presents I’ve ever received — these two bodies, 176 years old and 110 years old combined, simply being together.

I revel in the Incarnation — in the fact that we are in relationship with a God who somehow knows what it is to be held and to hold. This was in March, but it might as well have been December 21st, celebrating the Incarnation.

“That wasn’t enough.”
 Isn’t that the message? Isn’t that God’s message in the Incarnation?

God looking upon the world: “That wasn’t enough.”
 “What do you mean?”
 “I just… I have to get in bed with them.
 I have to play soccer with them.
 I have to dance with them.
 I have to listen to music with them.
 I have to laugh and weep with them.
 What we had wasn’t enough.”

On Christmas morning, God saying:
 “This is enough.
 The Incarnation is enough.”

And then Christmas morning leads to the Pietà — Christmas and Easter as dance partners. What begins at Christmas crescendos at Easter. And it all has to do with the Incarnation:

I am with you.
 I am with you.
 That wasn’t enough — or that was enough.

Heart to Heart community:
 You have a good heart.
 You have a really good heart.

Blessed Advent and Merry Christmas.